I’m a fuckboi, I know. But let me tell you how Becky tried it.

I really am like that fuckboi (gender nonspecific term) that won’t go away, aren’t I? Even after well over a year of zero communication, when you’re happy and thriving, I send you a “how you been?” text. It’s almost as if I’ve sensed that you’re moving on and have to come back and mess with your head one more time.

At some point, we’ll both have to stop torturing ourselves and actually sever ties. Some of you might have already pulled the plug and I cannot blame you (I know I just said that I can’t but I absolutely do. Blame you that is. Because as I mentioned earlier, I’m a fuckboi and that is what a fuckboi does. Tells you one thing when s/he really means something else)

Kanye shrug

Sorry, not sorry. Sidenote: We should all pray for brother Kanye

Some of you might screen my calls but still read my texts.  And despite all of your friends telling you to block my number, you falter and decide to meet up for just 1 drink. We all know where that leads 😉

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It’s ok boo. It happens to the best of us

The last few of you are the ones that have kept calling, kept sending the random “hey, hope you’re well” or “just thinking about you and wanted to say hi” texts. And to you I say: “I wish I appreciated you more and gave you what you deserved from me, CONSISTENCY and RECIPROCITY”.  But we both know that I’ll never change. A fuckboi will do what a fuckboi does.

Zoe Kravitz gif

This is what a fuckboi does after they send you a text trying to mess up your whole life

As you reflect on your life choices, wondering which group you belong to and which group you’d like to belong to, let me holla at you real quick and get something off my chest. Because despite my lackadaisical attitude and being completely undeserving of y’all, I know y’all to be great listeners (well readers) and I need to share with you how these wypipo keep trying me.

Kingsley

If you are a Black person in these United States of Amerikkka , you might have experienced being followed in a store, being called a slur (or several if you sit at the intersection of Blackness and Queerness/Transness/Different Ableness etc…), being told that you’re “so well-spoken” (the implied bit is that you’re well-spoken for a Black person) or “Black but not like Black Black” (actually it’s not just in this messed-up country but I’ve already spent a lot of time writing an unnecessarily long intro before getting to my point. Sorry!) You may also find that certain people think that they’ve walked into a petting zoo and you’re one of the main attracttions.

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And sometimes, they just say THE👏🏾 STUPIDEST👏🏾NONSENSE👏🏾AND👏🏾WON’T👏🏾SHUT👏🏾THEIR👏🏾FACE.

white guy talks about having it hard

I mean, just look at the orange shrew, “trigger fingers turn to twitter fingers”, they call their president. This man stays willin’ and says the craziest things. And while it’s easy to dismiss “conservatives whites” or “T***** supporters”, the “liberal whites” aren’t much better. They be saying out-of-pocket things too. Take for instance this experience at the airport in Entebbe.

As we’re standing in line, the security guard tells us to drop our bags and move to the side. We all look on as the guard tries to get a dog to sniff out any suspicious materials. And because people don’t know when to keep their stupid thoughts to themselves, this very blonde, very white woman whispers loud enough for some of us to hear: “But I’m not a terrorist. I mean come on”

the fuckery

Why do y’all insist on being trash? ANSWER ME BECKY!

I wanted to snatch Goldilocks’ non-existent edges. She might as well have said “I’m not Brown y’all. And we all know that only Brown people are terrorists. So let’s stop this charade because I, a delicate white wallflower, should never be considered dangerous.”

Whiteness

Becks, y’all (as in wypipo), are the largest terrorist group. For centuries, y’all have decimated, enslaved, abused, disenfranchised and marginalized entire countries. Y’all continue to kill us – whether we’re sleeping in our homes, walking home with skittles in our pockets, praying, protecting our children, standing in line, listening to music or simply being our authentic selves. You’ve built entire systems to slowly squeeze the life out of us because immediately ending lives wasn’t enough to satisfy your sadistic needs. Let’s not even talk about how you contribute to the destabilization of economies and make them completely dependent on foreign aid while refusing to pay up those reparations (+ compounded interest).

And you (specifically Becks), know that “the preservation of white women’s virtue” has been motive enough to kill Black men and y’all have fully taken advantage of that. You’ve played the damsel in distress, lying and getting our babies beaten and killed. And when confronted with the fact that you uphold white supremacy, y’all are so quick to say “but…but…feminism”

So yes Becks, you do look like a terrorist. Matter of fact, when I think of terrorism, you and Chad are exactly what I think about.

white people are fucked up

PS: Haitians have a saying that goes “Mwen voye dlo, m’ pa mouye pèsonn” meaning “If this ain’t about you boo, then don’t get in your feelings. I’m talking to the ones who need to do better. So please do not #notallwhitepeople this.

PPS: No, I’m not back and will not be doing better. Y’all will just be surprised whenever I decide to come back on here and ramble.

“Idiotic research proposals” for $200 Alex!

People say/write some really dumb things in my presence. I debated writing about this but you know what… they need to learn. Plus, who gon’ check me boo?

Y’all… *takes a deep breath*

Kingsley

(Via Youtube.com/ItsKingsleyBitch)

I have the enviable task of reading through research proposals and collaborating with scientists to help their projects move forward. For the most part, it’s all scientific jargon, “Prevalence this…statistical significance that…etc” But a few months ago, I stumbled across this gem:

Race has shown an inverse relationship with poverty level since 2001″

For those of you who may not remember 9th grade math class, in an inverse relationship, as one thing goes up the other goes down.

So this mofo wrote that as race goes up, poverty goes down (and vice versa). Let’s reflect on this idiocy for a second.

My first thought when I read it was:

patrick-harris-this-is-so-going-into-my-blog-gif-funny-humor1

(via How I Met Your Mother/CBS Studios)

The second:

(via RuPaul's Drag Race)

(via RuPaul’s Drag Race)

Let’s dissect this shit for a second.

1. Does this person thinks that race is this gradient-like measurement? So if you have a whole lot of it, then your poverty level goes down. Should we be walking around saying:

-“Oh shit, gotta get me some of that race stuff. You know that stuff keeps you from being poor”.

– “You think I’ll be able to find a jar at Trader Joe’s? I need to buy some organic almond butter, so I’d rather get some race while I’m already there.”

– “I’m pretty sure TJs is sold out, but I’ll get you an extra jar at the Farmers’ Market tomorrow.

2. Or do they think that race is on a totem pole/ranking system? If you’re at the bottom, then you extra poor. How do you determine the middle?

– “What’s your race ranking?

-“I’m not sure. What does 1 equal again?

And if you’re multi-racial, are you parents’ rankings evenly weighted or population-weighted? Do they use the Current Population Weights from when your parents were born or when you were born?

Also, who does the ranking? Are the rankings constant across years or are they subject to change?

Example: If a Black person was a “3” in 2007, did they automatically get bumped to a “2” in 2008? You know, Black president, post-racial society and all!

But since B.O is bi-racial, do Black people get bumped a full-point in rankings or just half a point? Do White People get the other half? Who gets bumped down the ranks when one group gets bumped up?

So many unanswered questions….

Now as much I wanted to e-mail the person back and tell them:

You-are-so-dumb

That’s not enough. Their statement is IRRESPONSIBLE and as scientists WE NEED TO DO BETTER!

I think I understand what they were trying to say. “Due to complex societal issues such as structural racism, historically abused/disadvantaged groups are disproportionately represented in poverty.”  I also know that they didn’t mean that the “totem pole” of race inferred that one race was superior than the other (or I hope they didn’t because that keeps me from wanting to punch them in the throat)

(P.S: Their advisor signed off on this bullshit. Now maybe the advisor missed the fuckery that is that statement or maybe, they also need to be checked. If that’s the case, this is for you as well boo boo. A PhD does not make you immune to stupidity)

But that’s not what they wrote. Their statement tells me that either:

– The more race I have, the less poor I am

or

– On the totem pole of race, those at the bottom are S.O.L. when it comes to poverty.

And as celebrities refuse to learn with their weak-ass apologies, IMPACT matters. Not just your fucking INTENT. I can’t read your mind but I can tell you how you made me feel.

Too many times in grad school, I sat in a class where we talked about race, sex or any other demographic as variables that you input in a mathematical model. Nothing more.

But they’re not just variables. My Black female self can tell you that.

Newsflash! Those words are describing people and we do a true disservice to the populations that we aim to serve when we only see their identities as these variables that we need to “control for”to build a robust model.